Here he is...

As you can imagine we woke up early. We both were emotionally and physically exhausted from the day before. We went down stairs and we waited at the couch for our POA. We waited and waited and he never showed up. So we called...no answer. We called again..no answer.

My husband would go out to the balcony of our room and smoke. While he was out there the children walking by and waved at him. They melted him. So we grabbed the bags of candy we had brought and we went down to the hotel gate. There stood two little boys that eagerly took our candy, giggling as they ran away. Then 2 more came, next thing you know we were surrounded by at least 25 kids. So of course everyone got candy, even the mommas walking by. We immediately noticed that these kids were walking this nasty road to school and they didn't have any shoes on. If they did have shoes they were flip flops and most were broken. My heart broke, my daughter had enough shes in her closet to put on each child's feet that we gave candy to and they didn't have any. It was a horrible realization into how much excess we have as Americans.

Finally our POA called us back, he was on his way with our sweet boy. He said would be there within one hour. I'll remind you this is already about 4 hours after the time he told us the night before that he would be there. An hour came and went, still not there. I think God for that time of waiting. In the hours that we waited for him to bring our sweet boy we became very close with the hotel staff. They took care of us. Actually, they went above and beyond and took us up to the market behind the hotel so we could get our sweet boy a soccer ball and some candies. The staff at he Treasureland Hotel was nothing less than Amazing! When we got back from the market he still was not there with our son. I was beyond angry at this point. We sat on the couch and posted picture and the kids and candy and waited. Tony went upstairs to get something and i tried to call our POA again..still no answer. At that very moment Our POA walked in the door of the hotel. Ohh, if looks could kill!! :) Then walked in this small little boy with a frown on his face. He was being instructed in their language (Twi) to sit on the couch. He sat across from me, wouldn't even look up at me. Tony come out of the room and smiled from ear to ear. He was finally there. Next walked in our POA, a lady and a man. Our POA came up to us and said "This is the boys mother as you requested to meet" Lets go somewhere in private to talk.

We were told our sons birth mom didn't know English so our POA did all of the translations for us. I wanted to meet his birth mom, that's true but i did not know she was coming at that time. I was not in any way prepared on what to ask her or talk to her about. I was very angry at the situation, i should've been notified so i could have been prepared. So I just covered the basics. Why can you not provide for him anymore, when did he go to the orphanage, do you want to keep in contact with us, what can you tell me about him as a child. It was heart breaking! Here our sweet boy sat by the only mom he has ever known and hasn't seen in a while had to listen to his mother say she couldn't provide for him and even at one point she pushed her arms out as if she was shooing away an animal. I looked at Isaiah and his little heart was beating out his shirt, he had tears in his eyes, he was scared to death. Instantly i reversed the situation and imagined me sitting on the other side of the table having to give my daughter up for adoption and her having to hear all those things. I started crying and couldn't stop. My heart was breaking for everyone. Here was this lady, (his birth mom) that loves her son enough to realize that she can not provide for him. That loves him enough to send him to an orphanage where he will be provided for and have a chance to be adopted. Its a situation that most people just can not comprehend. I know I struggle with it myself.

So we take him into our room to show him all of the things we have brought him as our POA, the birth mom, oh and the man is who runs the foster home he lives at left. He didn't have much to say and i didn't know what to ask him. He looked through his things and started pointed downstairs and kept saying "Annet". We couldn't figure out what he was saying. I was soooo angry. We were told he knew English very well. We couldn't understand  a word he was saying. He started jumping up and down screaming and crying yelling "Annet". So i tried to hug him, i just wanted him to know he was ok. He screamed even louder, jumping harder, he kept pointing down the stairs and tried running out the door. I assumed he was speaking of his mother. I thought he was upset because after seeing her he got upset. The screaming got louder, he wouldn't let me touch him. So i told Tony to go downstairs and get help. Have I mentioned how angry i was? When Tony opened the door he tried to run out it. So picked him up and tried hugging on him, i didn't want him running through the lobby screaming with the only 2 white people in the area. That would look real great! So I stood in front of the door, when he sees the balcony door. He runs to it and slings it open. Oh my God, he was going to try and jump out the window. SO i grab him and bear hug him. We (try) sit on the bed, in a bear hug. He pinched me, kicked, did everything he could to try and get away from me. about that time the door open. It was tony and the desk boy from down stairs. He asked him what was wrong. He again said "annet" I said he keeps saying that but we don't know what that means. So he spoke to him in Twi. Derrik (the desk boy) giggled and said its ok go, and he started to walk out the room. I was like uhh.. where's he going? Derrik said " he has to "urinate." I was such an emotional mess I said what's that mean? He said me must go to the wash room, he needs to pee. I felt like such an idiot!! Here is this child that's going to be our son and i can't even tell when he has to pee!!

I was angry at God. I was angry at our POA. I was angry at myself for falling in to the fiction of a perfect Hollywood adoption story, where the child is happy to see you. Adoption means pain. Hearts are broken, situations stink, and parents can't provide. If it was all good then he wouldn't be up for adoption. He knew he was going to adopted. He had seen our pictures but he had no idea that i had been working on paperwork, praying, and loving on him for over a year. His life went on with his normal and every few months he got some really cool gifts. My world come to a slow down and in some cases a complete stop to get paperwork done so we can get him here. He will never know, or fully understand what i have gone through emotionally, mentally and physically to get him here. To him I am just some white lady taking him from everything he knows. Taking him from his home (foster home, country friends, family). We learned that he had never seen white people or a man with a beard before and he was scared of us. EXAMPLE: Picture it we have all seen green aliens on TV and pictures, but if a green alien comes up to you, tells you that it loves you and you are going home with it. You would be terrified too. It's the exact same thing. With the help of the hotel staff by the end of our trip he was calling us mommy and daddy. It was a long 3 days. We had to teach him to touch us. Just by giving him a high five when he did something good, or when he got a point on the game on Tony's phone. The first few hours were tough. After that it wasn't bad at all, It took the rest of the time we were there to start trust. We played soccer...lots and lots of soccer, went to the zoo and market. We took baby steps.

So most of you are probably thinking why would you share this? Well, its important to me that i share all of our adoption story the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful. Our adoption story is beautiful. It HAS NOT been easy. My son is not what i expected. I am telling you all of this so when you think your ready give in or give up don't. If we were placed in the situations as these children i promise we would behave worse. Adoption is not easy, and it's not for the quitter. There have been several times i have question God, praised him, been confused and/ or angry at him. It's ok, Christ loves me anyways, even when I'm deserve it the least. When the going gets tough i get to praying, never quiting, or giving up because my story isn't the way i had planned. When you start thinking like this you make the story about you and its not. It's about Jesus and the way he uses us in each and every part of our lives. We adopt because he has adopted us as his children. All of the good and bad of adoption is a beautiful story written by God. For he knew my story first.